Jade Harley (
lastonethere) wrote in
noondayclock2011-12-30 07:27 pm
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[As 'lame' as she's been told it is to spend a Saturday night indoors, that's exactly how she's choosing to spend it. She'd been out with a group of people she only tolerated half the time and Dave earlier this afternoon, and she'd gotten the distinct impression it hadn't been a fun experience for much of anyone. And if that was the tone setting for the day, the only place to spend it is on her couch.
Which she's doing with a textbook Dave left lying around, a mug of hot chocolate, and with absolutely every light in the apartment on. What is caring about an electricity bill? Though she perks up a little when she hears a key in the front door]
Which she's doing with a textbook Dave left lying around, a mug of hot chocolate, and with absolutely every light in the apartment on. What is caring about an electricity bill? Though she perks up a little when she hears a key in the front door]
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And that bite? That gets him even more aggravated, like somehow he's the bad guy here. (Okay maybe he is being a total tool at the moment), but he wasn't the one to say all of this to Jade in the first place. He ended up having to take a lot of shit for the way she acts, and she can just shrug it off with ease and let him deal with the consequences. None of that seemed fair to him.
None of that was true either, but to Dave at the moment it was all solid fact. ]
Sure...
[ Just one word. One word uttered in a skeptical tone that suggested maybe what they said about her really was true after all. ]
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But feeling bad, and wanting to be someone else were two different things, and when Dave acted like this, like he thought it was her fault, she had almost no patience to be the bigger person and see this from his side.
Which is why she pulls farther away from him at that word. If it had been Dave being cranky about having to give in and admit in a round about way he was in the wrong, she could have over looked it. Because Dave never made being wrong, easy, and the acknowledgement is enough for her, if the grievance is small. But this sounds like doubt, and that sends unease flooding back into her senses. The feel of something being wrong here back to itching under her skin]
What's that supposed to mean?!
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It feels like he's the only one that gives a shit around here, and now he's the bad guy for fucking agreeing with her. To Dave, this is all absolute bullshit. ]
It means "sure". Jesus Christ. It was one fucking syllable, what the hell are you getting upset at me for?
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It was the way you said it, Dave! Like you didn't mean it. Why wouldn't that upset me?
[Tell her she's reading too much into this because it's been a shit day]
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Yeah, well maybe I didn't mean it.
[ No... Dave. No. ]
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She opens and closes her mouth, once, twice, voice small]
Oh...
[Give her a second, she's just...Got to process the fact that you just shattered her life and everything she's thought about it for the past year]
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That doesn't mean he's about to apologize, but it does mean he gets silent, not ready to tear into her any more than he already has. ]
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...Is that what you say to them when I'm not around? Do you just laugh at me, Dave?
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All he would need to do is stay quiet, reassure her that wasn't the case, but of course Dave being the idiot he is, is going to get defensive the moment he gets accused. ]
You really think I'm that kind of asshole?
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[She doesn't mean to say it, not really. She couldn't have said it wasn't true, and that a part of her didn't think it, because that would have been a lie. There is nothing stopping Dave from being more of himself and comfortable with his own image and his own skin, other than him. But she doesn't mean it negatively, because she's always loved him for the whole deal, mess and arguments and all.
And his sitting up, and the furrowed brows, and the defensive tone all make her doubt the last few moments. But, she's also never doubted him before. She's had her insecure moments, sure, when an ex popped out of the word work or a fight got too large. But it was all about their ability to make it work, she'd never doubted the sincerity of his feelings before. And that changes everything]
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A coward, however? That was another matter entirely and the idea that she thought he was one really got to him. After everything he'd done to protect her, John and Rose in the fucking game. The number of Daves that had been sacrificed in the process of trying to protect their stupid asses, the amount of times he'd had to stare death right in the eye just to keep them safe and now she was pulling this horseshit on him?
No. Fuck that. No.
Without a word Dave got up off the couch, and silently walked past her, making sure to avoid any sort of physical contact on his way towards the door. ]
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Because compounding in the back of her head is a list of all the reasons this is even happening. And it all just boils down to the fact that this is his fault. If he'd stood up for her, no, if he'd been honest with her, all of this could have been avoided. She could have never left her island, always wondered 'what if' while he picked some bleach blonde that fit into his image. Because at the end of the day, the person in this relationship that mattered most to Dave was the image of himself he concocted in front of the mirror. It angers her, but not as much as the fact that because of all of these things, he's taken the thirteen year old boy who used to make her laugh, who sat on a planet catching frogs and helped her make winter clothes so she wouldn't be left behind, away from her.
She's off the couch with her discarded book sailing past his head to snag his attention away from leaving]
Fine, just run away Dave! That's got to be so much better than just saying how you really feel! Real brave of you!
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This was bullshit.
Dave stares at the door for a few seconds, making sure he can keep his face in that unreadable pokerface of his before finally half twisting his body around to look at her while shoving a hand in his pocket. ]
Almost as brave as tossing something at the back of a guys head. Who knew you had it in you?
[ And with that little snarky comment he'll return the favor. Pulling his hand out of his pocket and tossing her the keys to her apartment she'd had made for him.
He hesitates for just a half a second, debating leaving on a "Later", but that move? No, there isn't really going to be a later, is there? So he concludes lamely with- ]
Harley.
[ --before finally walking out the door for real, shutting it quietly behind him instead of slamming it like he'd originally intended. ]
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The words sting all the same, as she stares down at the keys silently. She doesn't stop him, doesn't say more, even when he says her name. This is what they've dissolved into? She feels like she should have seen it coming, isn't that what the heroine of every bad romance movie thinks?
But she can't. They had problems sure, but nothing to her, that would have justified the things they were doing to each other. That would have made ending it the better option. She sinks back down on the couch, and at the quiet click of the door, rather than a loud slam, the tears finally start to fall. She clutches the keys hard to her chest, knuckles turning white.
She hadn't known she'd had it in her either.]